My Name was Supposed to be Elizabeth Ann

Dear Stephen Colbert:

You don’t know me, but I’ve been a fan for almost twenty years, since The Colbert Report on Comedy Central, and Hubby and I have been faithful Late Show viewers since you took over as host (though, to be honest, I usually watch the recordings. 11:30 is way past my bedtime.) Often when the world seems  bleak and glum (these days, every day), I binge recordings, needing a good belly laugh, and like many viewers, I was upset to learn of your show’s suspect cancellation. 

Recently, I’ve been thinking about your flipped interview with Jon Stewart which aired November 27, 2018, specifically when about halfway through he asked you to name your favorite Biblical character.  At first you picked Aaron, but then you picked Job because Job, you said, never cursed God despite his tribulations. And then you recited your favorite lines from J.B., Archibald MacLeish’s Pulitzer-prize winning play, which reimagines Job as a prosperous American businessman:

“I heard upon his dry dung heap
That man cry out who cannot sleep:
‘If God is God He is not good,
If God is good He is not God;
Take the even, take the odd, 
I would not sleep here if I could
Except for the little green leaves in the wood 
And the wind on the water.’”

You recited the lines a bit differently, however, but that’s okay. In 2018, shortly after I watched that episode’s recording for the first time, I looked it up, because although I had read both the play and Biblical versions several times, I did not recall that bit, per se, which Nickles says to Mr. Zuss as they prepare to stage Job/J.B.’s misery. I looked it up, because I was also curious about why you chose those lines. Lines which, on the surface, suggest a greater positivity than those I recalled from my first reading of the play in AP Lit senior year, some 40 years ago.

Before I share with you my favorite lines and why I’m just writing to you now, let me say, I have never liked Job’s story. Or rather, I have never liked God in Job’s story. Job is a good guy, King James asserts, “perfect… upright and [eschewing] evil,” yet God—at Satan’s urging—agrees to test him.  He literally makes a bet with Satan that allows him to torture Job in every way imaginable except–Satan must spare Job’s life. This is the same God (all dogma aside) described in Matthew 7 as a benevolent Father who answers prayer not according to what we children think we need but what he knows we need. 

Okaaay, now imagine explaining that bet to Child Services. 

Anyway, because I was curious, I decided to reread the play. Only, I couldn’t find my copy, which my teacher had gifted me senior year, when I asked if I could please keep it. MacLeish’s retelling had left such an impact on my eighteen-year-old worldview. 

But I couldn’t find that copy and instead reread this copy:

Which I’d bought for my classroom library, when I began teaching AP Lit.

That copy contained your lines but not mine, so I read this copy:

Thinking, maybe my lines had been edited out? Maybe I’d read a different, earlier edition?

Again, however, that edition contained only your line, and I started to think maybe I’d imagined ‘my’ lines, or misremembered where I’d read them? By this time, I had skimmed both copies multiple times just to be sure I hadn’t somehow missed them. I hadn’t, and Google was little to no help at all.

Why even bother? 

Because when I read J.B. senior year, I was suffering through some pretty serious stuff, none of which made sense or was justified. None of which by any measure I ‘deserved,’ and I wondered–like we all do when we suffer–Why me? 

You’re a reader. And you suffered too, as a young person, more than one should be expected to bear. You’ll understand then when I say, Those lines I’d memorized built a lifeboat. Teenaged me had clung to it, desperately. Adult me couldn’t bear to have lost it. Which is why I resumed searching for ‘my’ J.B. and found it–FINALLY–in a box way in the back of a shelf in our guest room closet. How it got there, I have no clue. I needed a stepladder to reach it.

Here it is, a xeroxed copy* of the BROADWAY PLAY (not the book), which MacLeish had revised for the stage and which Elia Kazan** produced. I hadn’t realized until multiple rereads how radically different those versions from each other.

I’m curious which versions you’ve read, and whether you recall my favorite lines?

Whereas yours occur at the beginning, mine occur near the end, when J.B., dumbfounded, opens the door to discover his wife Sarah has returned to him, and Mr. Zuss, positioned “a bit above” the couple, “flings off [the robe he wore to play God] in a gesture of triumph,” anticipating J.B.’s capitulation. “You’ve found / The answer at the end!… / We take what God has sent.”

In other words, God’s answer to why we suffer–to why even children suffer–is Because I said so. “We take what God has sent.”

Ummm, no?

Zuss continues:

“There is no resolution of the mystery 
Of unintelligible suffering but the dumb
Bowed head that makes injustice just 
By yielding to the Will that willed it–
Yielding to the Will that willed 
A world where there can be injustice.”

And they’re some of my favorite lines in the play, because Zuss’ explanation is correct but not right, and because his non-answer infuriates J.B.  He rejects it. He will not curse God, but neither will he acquiesce. He pushes back, telling Zuss:

“I will not
Duck my head again to thunder–
That bullwhip crackling at my ears!--although
He kill me with it.”

Even Nickles receives a tongue-lashing:

“Life is a filthy farce, you say,
And nothing but a bloody stage
Can bring the curtain down and men
Must have ironic hearts and perish
Laughing…. Well, I will not laugh!”

He turns back to Zuss, then excoriates them both:

“And neither will I weep among
The obedient who lie down to die
In meek relinquishment protesting
Nothing, questioning nothing, asking
Nothing but to rise again and
bow!
Neither the bowing nor the blood 
Will make an end for me now!
Neither the
Yes in ignorance … 
the No in spite…. 
Neither of them!”

Such FURY in those lines, such disdain for those worldviews! I hear the whip crack in J.B.’s delivery. So forceful is his rejection of Zuss and Nickles’ interpretations of his suffering that they are silenced for the play’s remainder, relegated to downstage ramps and merely observing but not participating in J.B. and Sarah’s reconciliation.

Such subtle yet powerful blocking, I think, because it suggests a necessary shift in POV.

In power.

The onus to forge a path forward falls on J.B. and, by extension,

Us.

That was the lesson teenaged me took into the world–‘Why me’ is the wrong question.

The right question is, WHAT’S NEXT?

Recall, God’s wager does not unfold in isolation. What about Sarah and her murdered children? Their suffering matters less than J.B.’s?

I’m thinking MacLeish wondered about them, too, because SPOILER ALERT: His ending to the play is not his ending to the book. Yes, only J.B. and Sarah speak, but the dialogue and its speakers differ, as does the action. Even punctuation edits influence understanding.***

I’m curious how a third ending might look, one that merges the best of both versions. Curious, too, how Sarah’s version might be staged. What their children might say, if allowed a voice.

That’s why–sort of–I’m writing now, nearly eight years after your interview with Jon Stewart aired.

See, I’m still not a fan of Job’s story, but I love J.B. And I love your story, that you pushed back, too, despite your family’s “unintelligible suffering.” You struggled, I’ve read–perhaps you struggle still–but you did not acquiesce. You strived, as J.B. does, toward love and life, not despair and retribution, and look where that path has taken you. Look at the stage upon which you now speak. As you explained to Jon Stewart, you picked Job as your favorite biblical character because “[His] is the gratitude you have to have in life no matter what dung heap you lie on.” I admire that outlook, tremendously.

Even more so, I admire that you ACT on that gratitude in your professional life when you call BS on anyone–like Nickles and our current administration–who creates and delights in others’ suffering.

Keep doing that, please, no matter the next version of your story. As a satirist and entertainer, yes, but more importantly as a human being. Our world needs more people like that, people who reject their own and others’ ignorance and spite.

You can bet on it.

Sincerely,

A fan from Pennsylvania

*****

Postscripts…

* With apologies to publisher Samuel French, Inc.

American public schools have been chronically under- and inequitably funded since their inception and needs must. I’m sure Mr. Oberholtzer purchased at least a few copies. He was a stickler that way. All excerpts quoted above are taken from the Samuel French edition.

** Such irony, I later realized, considering Kazan’s participation in McCarthy’s witch hunt.

*** One such example is the line “Blow on the coal of the heart,” which both characters say in different ways, at different times in the scene, AND with different punctuation. I’m curious how you interpret those changes?

WHAT I’M READING NOW…

I loved A Man Called Ove and have read a few of his other books, so I grabbed this one from the ‘Just In’ shelf:

So far, so very good.

WHAT I’M READING NEXT…

Something from last week’s library pile:

Also, Nexus, Harlem Shuffle, and The Covenant of Water have spent an embarrassing amount of time on my TBR shelf. I’m thinking I’ll work my way through my loans, then start on them.

Unless, of course, some of my holds come in 🙂

RECENT READS AND RECOMMENDATIONS…

From last month’s library pile:

Twist–A broken man meets another broken man whose job entails diving deep beneath the ocean to repair broken information cables. But will they figure out how to repair themselves? Quiet, meditative and gorgeous writing, the payoff at novel’s end made up for its slow start. I’ve been wanting to read this one for awhile and am glad I finally got the chance.

The Lion Women of Tehran–I knew how Ellie and Homa’s story had to end. I loved their story anyway.

Her Heart for a Compass–I watched Diana marry Charles and Sarah marry Andrew, so of course I had to read for myself whether Fergie could write a novel. She can, but it was not my cup of tea. 

Zero Days–Predictable villain, though a quick and entertaining whodunit. I hadn’t read any of her books before, but will add her to my list.

The Last Murder at the End of the World–Loved the premise but wasn’t really drawn to the characters and so, DNF🥺Apologies, sir, but I am not the reader for this book.

Built with Broken Pieces by Mindful Muser, the pen name of a former student. Her lovely poetry collection testifies to the healing power of imagination, verse, and speaking one’s truth. 

COMING UP NEXT ON MY NAME WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ELIZABETH ANN…

‘Reading, Writing, and Resolutions’: An Update. In January, I made several promises to myself and you. Think I kept them? Check back next month and I’ll tell you 😉

Now You Tell Me…

Who is your favorite author? What book of theirs would you suggest to someone who’s never read any? I’m always looking for recommendations!!

*****

Thanks for reading! Thanks for sharing!